waterhouse

better to get started than to get overwhelmed.

harmonious development

allowing oneself to see the value in maturity and age.

learning to stay with a painful issue long enough to see that a problem exists.

noting the times with mental evasiveness occurs; over scheduling, multiple projects, new options, future plans.

when thinking and activity move into hyper-drive, a seven is on the run.

recognizing the habit of substituting an idea of what pain is like for the tension of living through the reality.

noting that superficial pleasure and lack of depth in commitment leads to a compulsive desire for more pleasure and fun.

noting that one is missing out on depth of experience and pleasure by staying on the surface.

noting the fear of committing deeply to oneself.

recognizing the assumption of being entitled to special treatment. 

seeing the scope of real responsibility.

holding ground when underlying paranoia arises.

trying to see the difference between criticism and realistic self-evaluation.

noting feelings of fear when ideas about self-worth are challenged.

being willing to work through episodes of fury when wounded.

recognizing efforts to charm the situation.

recognizing the escape into fantasy, mood elevators, sensory overload.

developing the ability to stay with the present moment rather than escape.

letting unfulfilling options go.

15 Things you should give up to be happy.

a friend posted this on FB today. its sort of a clunky, cliched/trendy article but there are a few points in here that are good to remember today.

4, 5, 9 and 14.

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1. Give up your need to always be right

 There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?” Wayne Dyer. What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?

2. Give up your need for control

Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.

3. Give up on blame

 Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.

4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk

 Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating.

5. Give up your limiting beliefs

about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place.

6. Give up complaining

 Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it.

7. Give up the luxury of criticism

Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.

8. Give up your need to impress others

Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.

9. Give up your resistance to change

 Change is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.
“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls” Joseph Campbell

10. Give up labels

 Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. 

11. Give up on your fears

Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.

12. Give up your excuses

Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.

13. Give up the past

I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.

14. Give up attachment

This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another,  attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things without even trying.

15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations

Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need….and eventually they forget about themselves.  You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.

now please.

now please.

googlesick

it’s too easy to google-stalk ghosts of the past. i feel like i need to wash my mouth out. no- more like my brain and my heart. ugh. nauseating.

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but it brings something else. a want for continuous change, new music, gratitude, fresh air, travel, love, knowledge, priorities. i climb out of that grimy internet vortex of shame, lost people and sharp emotions feeling relieved and content to land in my sunny present. excited for now and forever the future. meaningful relationships, productive work, exercise.

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i’ve been to at least 6. i want to go to the arches this summer so badly! <3 (and joshua tree.)

i’ve been to at least 6. i want to go to the arches this summer so badly! <3 (and joshua tree.)

angela and i had a sunny thursday night patio drink- looking west into the sunset and out to the mountains. on our way home we found these amazing little scenes set up like fairy gardens in front of an apartment building.

angela and i had a sunny thursday night patio drink- looking west into the sunset and out to the mountains. on our way home we found these amazing little scenes set up like fairy gardens in front of an apartment building.

also. scheming el salvador over fourth of july for mary&#8217;s 30th birthday.
hammocks and surfing sounds amazing.

also. scheming el salvador over fourth of july for mary’s 30th birthday.

hammocks and surfing sounds amazing.